I have been chionging work for the past 2 weeks and i earned about 700 plus.. But as usual, the money does not stay long in my account and i am only left with 500 plus... Hahaz.. So loser right... What is the point of earning money when you cannot save it... Oh wells, should curb my spending already...
My STUPID laptop got problem again.. The same problem where the A button has a life of its own.. So i sent it down for repair AGAIN... FREAKING far can! The both of us just got lost and we were walking under the scorching sun lah!
Anyway, you are finally out after like s0o0o0o0oo freaking long... Though you are out for a long weekend, but we both are like so busy with our own lives that u doubt we would be spending much time together... But i guess its fine, after all we kinda got to get used to it since i will be really away soon... Yeap...
In this 2 weeks, i bought 6 months worth of contacts suitable for people with astigmatism, a pair of heels, a dress cum blouse and 2 sets of bikini!! Okie, the bikini is more of a gift then i buy... Thanks love... Although you know i really don't feel good when you spend so much money on me... But i really appreciate all the things you have done for me so far... Thanks for making me feel that i do matter... Thanks for making me feel valued and treasured for... =) I love you...
This is just a really short update on what had happened for the past 2 weeks... Just working and training and thats it...
Okie, now i have come to the main reason that i feel like blogging today...
Don't know why i am feeling so peeved... Was having a really perfect day till i was waiting for bus 15 home which took freaking long... As usual, nothing to do so i started thinking, then i became so pissed and sore.. Its like, i was suddenly overwhelmed with alot of thoughts and feelings that made me so peeved...
So many things has been happening ever since i came back.. I got to know of information that i never knew... Though these information cut and hurt me deep, i am glad i got to know them... All i can say is that, during the past 3 years in my polytechnic school life, i have made many friends.. Those that care, those that don't, those that i am close to, those that i am not close to... Friends that i trusted so much, and friends that betrayed/abused the trust... I even made a group of 'friends' who posed as friends.. But in fact behind my back stab me like there is no tomorrow... In other words, i made many friends that are hypocrites... Those who SEEM close to you and care for you, but with a different group of friends, they stab you like you are a dummy, cause it does not hurt them a single bit... But it is thanks to these hypocrites that i have learned to accept the fact that me pinning hopes that things can go back to the way they were is just IMPOSSIBLE... It has helped me to move on and get attached to a new group, a group that i should not have detached myself away in the first place... Morale of the story, Friends can turn into enemies, and enemies can turn into friends...
I am sorry if i am so distant away now.. Once bitten, twice shy.. Or should i say twice bitten instead.. I don't know... I just do not wish to get involved, because getting involved = getting hurt... I don't know whether i am a bitch or slut in all of your eyes, but i am really too weak, sick, tired and afraid to suffer a blow right smack in the face again... Picking up isn't easy...
It's through these hard times when i was trying too hard to cope with the change and the information overload that i found you... You never once pressured me to do something that i did not want to do... Even when you felt so strong for us to give it a shot, you respected how i felt and gave me time, NEVER ONCE rushing me to make a decision or to answer you... Thanks love, you are great..
I am glad that i was accepted with open arms back to band to help the juniors.. Not from Springfield, but Ping Yi.. I appreciate the support and chance i was given to come back to help, and feel valued by the members.. My trumpeters, you guys and girls just rock.. Thank you..
The alumni like Mr Poh, Syafiq, Felix, Norman, Zach, Farzana, Chang Yuan, Khairul my son and Qi Zheng... You guys have made it easier for me to pick up and get back in my feet again... You guys might not know it, but hanging out with you guys just makes my day.. Those movie, interrogation and Al-ameen days... Kinda miss you guys cause i have not seen you all for quite some time...
To the best babes and hunk in my life, Charity, Lisa and Ian... You three are just the strongest pillars in my life other than my family... My constant pillar of support no matter what happens... Having my back always and keeping me on track.. Ensuring that i do not land into hands of bad vibes... Just wanna tell three of you how fortunate i am to have besties like the 3 of you.. I love you all... I really do not know what i would do if i lost any of you... I have got your backs to and i will support the three of you all the way, till i land my ass in the coffin... Hahaz...
Evelyn, i have not seen you like for AGES please.. I miss you babe.. I miss chatting with you, telling you how i feel and just sharing with you.. Hope you are doing great right now.. We should meet up soon.. Hahaz... Training for our marathon date?? Hahaz... Take care babe, thanks for providing me with the listening ear even though you are so busy and tired after work... Smiles!!
Okie, as usual, i am still not able to suck it up... Forgive, forget and just let go of it Sheryl... Hogging on and thinking about it will only make you feel more sore, not better.. Accept the fact that you made a decision, accept the fact that it is not going to change.. Choices have consequences, as long as you do not regret it, it is perfectly fine... I REALLY do not regret the decision made, but i am just feeling sore, like a loser...
Cheer up, smiles.. You got more waiting for you then just to sulk.. Move on babe!!
